Why are girls in their early 20's so insecure?

I'm not saying i'm perfect, i'm human and every now %26amp; then i'll have insecurities but i wouldn't let them take over and allow myself to be an insecure person - there's a difference. What if noticed lately is that girls in their early 20's are just as insecure/sensitive as high school girls? It is me or is that the case?





I'm a 21 yr old full time student - I just got accepted into my major. I have many friends but only 2-3 true, close ones. I don't go out and party and get me a** drunk at bars or clubs though there are some occasions where i'll drink and there are other ways i can "have fun" and relax. My main focus is to get my degree in healthcare so I can have a good career (w. a good paycheck) when i'm 23-24. I have many more goals i would LOVE to achieve and i believe that, that's time i'll let loose and really have fun. I don't want to be in a relationship b/c I feel i'm too young and i have more important priorities right now. Relationships are hard work and theres no room in my schedule. I'm fine/okay/happy being a young, single student. I don't need a man/stupid girl friends that show off at clubs or pics on myspace to be happy. I'm dealing w. sooo many girl friends that are like that tho:





- there's the girl that just broke up w. her high school bf and is an insecure mess. Always wanting me to go to bars w. her every weekend, in a relationsihp w. a guy she just met for a week, gives attitude if she doesn't get her way, and gets all her insecurities and takes it out on me.





- there's the girl w. the ego who thinks she's "better" than me b/c of her insecurities. she knows she has better grades but rather than doing goals, she TALKS more. Very arrogant and cocky and is motivated by jealousy. Has a crab mentatlity - if i were to accomplish a big goal in my life, she would respond by bringing herself up or bringing me down.





- then, there's the girl who gets to fulfil the secret desire to be the popular girl in high school...except she's in college. She's befriends everyone around her and beyond to get that acceptance and gossip to keep "fresh" in the game. She exaggerates more on the negative gossip of her friends to replenish the crap in her life. Believes she's a good friend and mutual when conflict goes down but tends to be biased/one sided.





Seriously, is it me that's weird or are girls just like this?

Why are girls in their early 20's so insecure?
everyone is insecure.


if no one was insecure, there would be no jobs, no clothes, no makeup, no hairstylists, no nothing.


insecurity is just a part of our society. period.
Reply:People are insecure no matter what age they are. Doesn't get any better when you get older...
Reply:move to india/africa/asia, anywhere you can get away from western idiot culture, where what you look like is more important than who you are.


or


just don't worry too much about it. there are lots of people who don't get sucked into it. just look for them. unfortunately the time of leaving home and going to uni puts a lot of stress on everyone and people can start behaving strangely for a while. The best way to conquer insecurity though is to make sure your friends know your there for them and not judging them (as you are from what u wrote) so they can just relax and be themselves, but that only happens if you relax and stop judging them. After all, criticizing never seems to help anyone change, just makes them feel bad.
Reply:Take a look at the science of socio-biology. Evolution shows a pretty clear biological progression from childhood to adolescents to early adulthood which is filled with challenges to the sense of self. Despite what we are told, biologically girls in their early 20's are focused on mating and reproducing. This does not mean sex. It means that they are trying to understand themselves and also to find a mate. Society tells girls that they have to look a certain way or act a certain way to be attractive. Of course all are measuring themselves against the unattainable perfection. If they could only be pretty or funny or smart or something they would find the perfect mate. Its all about finding a perfect mate and reproduction. We can deny this, but its in the genes.
Reply:Just remember that everyone has her own experiences that guide her own decisions. The girl that's an insecure mess might have been brought up in a way that made her believe she must have a boyfriend to be validated. That is not uncommon in any society. The egoistic girl may have anxieties about her own performance, or perhaps she has her own insecurities she wishes to mask.





It's never cut and dry. To understand anyone, you would have to have his or her full story with annotations. But there is nothing wrong with stability. Stable people are a magnet for success. The sooner these women realize this, the easier their years beyond will be.