This is for all the girls....im about to go out with this girl i really like, and shes the most special thing in my life right now, i dont kno how to say this to her, but i dont want to do it with her straight away or even for a few months, maybe even 6-12 months,since im not into just doing it like i used to be back when i was young, im over it, and want to have a special relationship with this girl....my question is, would she think im wierd?and how would most girls react to this?and whats the best way to put it to her?....theres no real reason for me not wanting to not do it with her, part from the fact i want it to be special with this girl, and i would rather build up to it, rather than what im used to with most of the girls ive been out with...what do girls think of this?, and should i tell her from the start?
Girls....am i wierd for not wanting THAT in a relationship straight away???
I think you are "right on". It is more special when you really like someone and want everything to be just right. When I was younger, amount of time before making love was just no big deal. But as we get older, and am looking for the one special person to have in our lives, sex isn't the be all-end all. When you do make love to this woman, after waiting because you want to make sure this is the one, it is going to be "magic"! And any woman that is looking for that one man will appreciate the way that you want to work your way into a relationship and not just sex.
Reply:Tell her right away. Your a good guy for not wanting to put yourself out there like that. I have a lot of respect for a guy who will respect his self and that other girl. Just be hounest with her and she shouldnt have no problems because if she does then somethings not right. A guy should love to wait to see what happens because yall have feelings too..
Reply:Well how your woman would react to this would really depend on your girls sex drive to be honest. I would be unhappy with that myself, but from what I've heard a lot of other women would be happy about it. Is it weird? Not really, it's old-fashioned perhaps, sweet in a way.
There is a slight flaw in your opinion though; "waiting" is not really what makes sex special... My honey and I can have a two minute quicky in the car that is more "special" then a two hour romp in the bedroom. - Sex is really only special because of the emotions that exist between the two people. You can not engineer the experience by waiting or planning... In fact, waiting too long might even have the opposite effect, putting the need for satisfaction over the need for connection so to speak...
A word of warning regardless of what you decide to do; try not to let your expectations get out of control, if you spend too much time dreaming of that special occasion you might end up disapointed... The brain can almost always create a better fantasy then would happen in real life; part of the reason that phone sex is so popular...
Anyway, I would certainly let her know so she doesn't think you don't find her attractive and so that she can understand, and respect, your decision/opinion on the matter. Although I have the feeling that if she wants to have sex, you will more then likely give in to her desire to do so; the vast majority of men are biologically weak in that area I believe. Which is where you need the "respect" part; if she respects your opinion on the matter she won't "tempt" you.
Keep in mind that telling her might backfire on you and make her want to have sex with you even more. - If she is anything like me, she would find the challenge exciting and fun and generally attempt to drive you crazy, but I tend to have a higher sex drive then most women. (I used to love to conquest; I'd find the virgin shy guy and generally molest him, I just loved the power trip...)
Reply:If all is going well with this girl and she has the same feeling for you as you do for her then when appropriate you need to tell her exactly what you wrote up above. If you tell her that you want it to mean something and that it's not a one night thing in your books then she wont think you are weird, if anything she would probably think you are a sweetheart. If she is so special to you just tell her. Good luck.
Reply:I think it's good that you have moral values and a conscience. THANK YOU for not wanting only a sex relationship, or at least not wanting sex right away. It's hard to find guys like you. You're quite valued! Good for you, sweetie! =) I appreciate knowing that there are still some guys left in the world like you.
Reply:Thats not weird, I know men who are single and still a virgin because they are preserving for their only wife alone so your case isnt weird afterall. This time you have reached a certain point in maturity when it comes to the act of sex and I believed that you wanted this relationship to be special so you decided not to plunged in that area immediately. Good for you and you should be proud of yourself because this time respect is what you want with to extend to your girl. The inner change in you towards the idea of sex is manifesting right now and I know that when sex urges hits both on you on the spot, this will be the perfect time to explain to her that you want something different this time not having sex right away or even for awhile...but i am not excluding the kissing part...you both need that to show deep affection and intimacy that includes hugging and holding hands. There is a perfect time to tell her not at the start of the relationship, it will come to the both you just let it flow then when it comes then you know what exactly to say to her...good luck and i hope this have help.....
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